Have you ever felt like you were kind of aimlessly wandering through life, just going through the motions to get through each day? We’ve probably all been there at one time or another.
Or maybe you set goals for yourself but find yourself struggling to achieve them and can’t figure out why.
Often, the reason for either of these scenarios relates to the question “Why?”. Without defining your why – your reasons, your motivation, your true deep-seated reasons – even the most specific, laser-focused goals may not happen.
I see this often in working with people on their fitness and nutrition. They want to lose weight and get in shape but usually their reasons are pretty generic. I work with these people to define their “why” that will help them reach their goals. While it’s easy to say your motivation to lose weight is to be healthy, that’s a pretty surface-level reason. And you probably already know HOW to lose weight – that’s creating a calorie deficit through food and exercise. Your WHY is what will motivate you and push you toward achieving your goal. Reaching deep inside and discovering your why can be challenging and sometimes even painful, but that’s what lights the fire to relentlessly pursue your dreams and goals.
Since weight loss is the number one goal for so many people, especially when the new year rolls around, let’s use that as an example. If your goal isn’t to lose weight, you can still apply these questions to your specific goal.
Let’s look at some questions to discover your why and to set you up for success:
- Why do you want to lose weight? Is it for your family, to feel better, to fit into that pair of jeans? Your reason should be personally meaningful to you – otherwise it won’t be enough to get you motivated and keep you focused.
- Now dig a little deeper into that why. Go beyond the surface level answer. If your why is for your family, ask yourself why that is so important. Is it because you want to be healthier and more active to be able to play with your children? Do you want to establish healthy eating habits for your children?
- Next, look at why you are in the place you are currently. What let you to gain this amount of weight? Why have you had trouble losing it? Why have you failed in the past? This may be a bit tougher but can help you overcome the obstacles that have held you back in the past. For some people that may mean counseling to get to the deeper issues and for some it may be trying a different approach. Failure can teach us so much but we have to look closely and change something to keep from repeating the same actions.
After you have thoroughly examined your why (and, of course, written it down), then you are ready to move on to the how and make a plan. Make sure that your plan directly addresses your why and keeps you moving toward your ultimate goal. Enlist the support of those close to you to keep you accountable and motivated. A friend with similar goals, a personal trainer or even an online coach can help keep you on track and focused on your why.
Jeanette says
June 2, 2016 at 8:25 amI found my why and it keeps me motivated. I do have weak days but over all I am doing really well with it. Until you have a focus you will not do it or at least not stick with it.
Jenny Finney says
June 2, 2016 at 8:53 amI think getting to the root of the problem, is a step in the right direction in losing weight. We all know HOW to do it, it’s just putting it into action and sticking with it.
Paula Schuck says
June 2, 2016 at 8:56 amGreat post. It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to do, you have to know why you’re doing it. Without the why, you’re a ship at sea with no rudder.
Paula Schuck recently posted…Breville Quick Touch Crisp Inverter Microwave Revolutionizes Microwave Cooking #QuickTouchCrisp
Cassie says
June 2, 2016 at 10:46 amGreat post! I agree that the biggest thing about losing weight as having a reason to lost it in the first place. I know my reason 🙂
Ana Elizabeth says
June 2, 2016 at 11:24 amIt’s important that we have goals for us to get motivated. I go to gym thrice a week because aside from I want to have ‘abs’ (:D), I also want to get fit to avoid illness. My mom and dad has diabetes and I don’t want to experience it. Prevention is always better than cure. 🙂
Pam says
June 2, 2016 at 2:54 pmThis is a great article. Unless you are truly motivated, you won’t be able to lose weight. I exercise to be able to play with my granddaughter. My dad wasn’t healthy and wasn’t able to play with the kids very much.
Nickida says
June 2, 2016 at 5:53 pmThanks for the great tips in this post. I want to lose weight myself but I just haven’t found my why yet. I think I really need to sit and think about it for sure because I would like to lose the weight, especially in my stomach area.
Nickida recently posted…Starting My Weight Loss Journey with Medifast
Shari says
June 2, 2016 at 7:36 pmI have been on a diet for the past 10 years and my why is a surface reason. It’s time to get serious and figure out what the real why is.
Jenn says
June 2, 2016 at 7:41 pmOh, this is great advise. Some of which I really needed to read. I’ve been struggling with my weight for a few years now.
Sarah says
June 2, 2016 at 7:50 pmWhat a great post with wonderful advice. I really needed to read this, thank you!
ricci says
June 2, 2016 at 8:55 pmThis is a great post that really breaks down the reasons why someone would want to lose weight. This advice would be great for any goal really…
Kristen Dann says
June 3, 2016 at 5:49 amMy “why” was 50% my health and 50% my son. He has high energy and needed a mom who could keep up with him without getting tired so easily.
Rebecca Swenor says
June 3, 2016 at 7:46 amThis is a great post and awesome information on how to define the why of achieving your goals. It is so important when trying to lose weight to realize the true why for your desire to lose weight. Losing weight is truly a life style change and in order to succeed you do have to want it for yourself. Thanks for sharing the information.
Dana says
June 3, 2016 at 9:04 amWe eat healthy BUT I am so lazy – I don’t exercise and that is my downfall!
Janell Poulette says
June 3, 2016 at 2:26 pmI once read that you should go back and eat the foods your grand parents ate and not what your parents fed you. Our grandparents ate healthy fats and unprocessed foods and that is how I try to eat.
Stephanie Pass says
June 4, 2016 at 12:25 amI definitely have my why, but it’s easy to just feel unmotivated. It’s such a struggle.
Vidya Sudarsan says
June 4, 2016 at 1:23 amI completely agree with your three points. I wish I was a bit more consistent when it comes to eating good food!
Amanda Love says
June 4, 2016 at 1:37 pmI’ve never really thought about finding my why, but for me it’s all about fitting into my clothing without having to buy new ones. 🙂
Amanda Love recently posted…Bring Balance to Your Life With Vagisil pH Balance Wash – #GetMoreFromYourWash
Pinay Mommy says
June 5, 2016 at 12:51 amI really wanted to be fit like having a regular exercise and all but I failed many times. Maybe because I have never tried to find my why.
Carla Patterson says
September 27, 2018 at 3:15 amGreat post! I’m currently at my weight loss journey as well – although I try to keep myself relatively skinny throughout the year, so it’s only just for a few periods! Thanks for being such a great motivation though:)